Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith

All right, I'm going to start this (not-so-timely) review with a very important message: Don't bring your children to this movie. I know, I know, they love Jar Jar (okay, hopefully they don't, but I figure someone out there must), they think Star Wars is great, they already have all latest action figures... but this film is rated PG-13 for a reason. When I went to see the movie for the second time, my jaw dropped at the amount of elementary-school aged children lining up outside the theater with their parents. This is not a movie for them. If your child's age is still in single-digits, don't take them. At eleven or twelve, it's your call, depending on how they've reacted other violent films, I suppose. I would guess this film has more non-space battle violence than all other five films combined. There is graphic, often disturbing violence, and some off-screen violent events that could really freak a child out. Got it? Good.

Now, moving on.

This is an excellent movie. It is very dark, and as I already mentioned, very violent. It needed to be, given the content. We knew this film would contain the fall of the Jedi, the likely death of Padme Amidala, and Anakin Skywalker's journey to the Dark Side. It's the one we've all been waiting for.

For the first time during this prequel trilogy, I found myself wishing that the original films could have been made today, or perhaps just that the same visual technology had been available years ago. That may seem blasphemous from the standpoint of many devoted fans, but this movie is amazing. There are two or three points when a Jedi did a flip or large jump where they had the rubber-y, CGI look, but more or less the effects are flawless, and noticeable only if you look for them. I don't know if there's actually been an improvement in the cityscapes or space battles, but it's the first time I noticed how much I didn't notice they were fake.

The acting is still a bit stiff, but certainly that's a Star Wars tradition (yes, I'm looking at you, Mark Hamill). I've heard some debate over whether Natalie Portman's acting was better or worse in this movie than in the others. Personally, I think she's improved slightly (although her other work certainly shows much more skill), but unfortunately, the pregnant Amidala has a far less pro-active role than in the previous films. Hayden Christensen has truly improved, enough so that he is able to carry this film without letting us down (and he is looking mighty fine, if I may add that unnecessary aside). Once again, I think it is Ewan McGregor who stands out in his role of Obi Wan Kenobi. Feel real pain for him in his last lines to his former student, and you'll understand why I would find it to be (an admittedly unlikely) treat if he received a supporting actor nomination from... well, there are plenty of award shows to choose from.

You'll find I haven't talked much about the plot of this film. That's because it's Star Wars, and if you don't have some idea already about what's going on... well, it makes me wonder how you've hooked up to the internet in your Martian cave.

Episode I awed us with the new effects, but disappointed us in its excessive cuteness. Episode II delighted us with the Jedi battle scenes we'd been waiting for, but made us cringe with the stiff romantic scenes. Episode III makes the low points of the other two worth it, I think, and can only upset you if you're really searching for a reason to dislike it.

Even if you waited for the other two to come out on DVD before you saw them, go see this one now, while it's still in the theaters. You're missing out if you don't. Just... leave the kids at home.

Bottom Line: All this waiting and putting up with Jar Jar finally pays off. Watch this movie.

What's all this about, then?

Greetings, gentle readers!

Perhaps you're wondering what this poor, empty blog is about? Obviously, it's about movie reviews. Without cutesy puns involving the movie title, a star system that never quite seems to be consistent, or a "review" that reads like it was written by PR people working for the studio that released the film.

I plan on providing reviews of movies in the theater (not always in a timely manner, or a very wide-spread selection of titles, due to my location), reviews of DVDs (more likely to be written very shortly after the release, a wider variety of films), and reviews of older movies that I just want to review, perhaps because they're extremely good, or upsettingly bad ("Hey? What movies do I own?" may decide the choices there).

So sit back, relax, and I hope to have my first reviews up soon (yes, if you're a real fan you've already seen Episode III, but I'm going to review it for you anyway).